Midterm Passage Essay

This essay has a total of 288 words and 1 pages.

Midterm Passage

"A cold lucid indifference reigned in his soul. At his first violent sin he had felt a
wave of vitality pass out of him and had feared to find his body or his soul maimed by the
excess. Instead the vital wave had carried him on its bosom out of himself and back again
when it receded: and no part of body or soul had been maimed but a dark peace had been
established between them. The chaos in which his ardour extinguished itself was a cold
indifferent knowledge of himself. He had sinned mortally not once but many times and he
knew that, while he stood in danger of eternal damnation for the first sin alone, by every
succeeding sin he multiplied his guilt and his punishment. His days and works and thoughts
could make no atonement for him, the fountains of sanctifying grace having ceased to
refresh his soul. At most, by an alms given to a beggar whose blessing he fled from, he
might hope wearily to win for himself some measure of actual grace. Devotion had gone by
the board. What did it avail to pray when he knew that his soul lusted after its own
destruction? A certain pride, a certain awe, withheld him from offering to God even one
prayer at night, though he knew it was in God's power to take away his life while he slept
and hurl his soul hellward ere he could beg for mercy. His pride in his own sin, his
loveless awe of God, told him that his offence was too grievous to be atoned for in whole
or in part by a false homage to the All-seeing and All-knowing."

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