Lady McBeths personnal insight

Lady McBeth

As I sit here and think back to the past events, I wonder if everything that was done was really necessary. I now realise
that it was my own selfishness that drove my husband to the person he has become. I fear him now. I don’t know what
became of me, maybe it was the excitement of the fact that I was to become queen one day. Why couldn’t of I just
waited till the day came naturally, instead of causing it to occur quicker than it should of. Oh why did I do this to myself,
and my husband. People used to worship him like he was king, he was a hero, but now, like myself they fear him. I have
betrayed my people. When he told me of the three weird sisters and of the prophecies they made I was skeptical , but
then he told me that he was declared Thane of Cawdor and I knew the sisters spoke of the truth. Oh why worthy thane
did you unbend your noble strength and succumb to my evilness, you knew it was wrong from the start, but still I
pushed and you being the loyal husband that you were, did as I wished. Now, Duncan is dead, dead from our own
hands, not the grooms that slept withal. "the sleepy and the dead are but as pictures; tis the eye of the childhood that
fears a painted devil……" what a foolish thought that was, I should of listened toyou instead of taking it upon our own
hands to do the deed. My hands are now stained with the blood of Duncan and no matter how hard I scrub it will not
remove itself from my skin. There is a doctor with me, I suppose trying to figure me out. Impossible. All I feel is guilt, I
have no need to speak to anyone, nor a want to. I know I am insane, he knows it and so does the nurse, so why do
they bother to try. Darling husband you saw the danger signs stamped all over me, but ignored them, because when
there is unconditional love there is no judgment. That is the way you saw it, that was the way you always saw it. What
happened, look what you have become. A monster, that is the only way I can express it, a human could not even
contemplate murdering his own best friend, for his own personal gain. I cant speak freely about this as I was as bad as
that if not worse. Although I have confessed to myself that I have done the worst that a person could do, and yet my
husband, you can not see past the power that you think you will receive. Can’t you see that McDuff knows what we’ve
done and soon a repercussion will come of it. Don’t fool yourself again by falling for the sisters words, for I know that
he will prevail and find away to bring you down. I do here about what goes on, the doctor and nurse talk about McDuff
going to England to see Malcolm and preparing a way of exposing our evilness. He was to become king, and he
deserved to. Not you, as the only thing you have done for the country is to cause hatred among your people. I am not
looking forward to that day, as by then he would of found out about his wife and children. I want to give you all of my
love, but all your kisses and fine words are not enough to heal my pain. And that is way I can no longer stay in this cruel
and horrible world of deception. You think I wen t first but really.. it was you. Farewell my love and I will no doubt see
you soon.
Lady Macbeth