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Hamlet: Aha! Come, some music! Come, the recorders! For if the King like not the comedy, why then, belike he likes it not perdy. Come, some music!
Guil: Good my lord, vouchsafe me a word with you.
Ham: Sir, a whole history.
Guil: The King, sir –
Ham: Ay, sir, what of him?
Guil: Is in his retirement marvellous distempered.
Ham: With drink, sir?
Guil: No, my lord, rather with choler
Ham: Your wisdom should show itself more richer to signify this to his doctor; for, for me to put him to his purgation would perhaps plunge him into far more choler.
Guil: Good my lord, put your discourse into some frame and start not so wildly from my affair.
Ham: I am tame, sir: pronounce.
Guil: The queen, your mother, in most great affliction of spirit, hath sent me to you.
Ham: You are welcome.
Guil: Nay, good my lord, this courtesy is not of the right breed. If it shall please you to make me a
wholesome answer, I will do your mother\'s
commandment: if not, your pardon and my return
shall be the end of my business.
Ham: Sir, I cannot
Guil: What, my lord?
Ham: Make you a wholesome answer; my wit\'s diseased: but, sir, such answer as I can make, you shall command; or, rather, as you say, my mother: therefore no more, but to the matter: my mother, you say,--
Ros: Then thus she says; your behavior hath struck her into amazement and admiration.
Ham: O wonderful son, that can so astonish a mother! But is there no sequel at the heels of this mother\'s admiration? Impart.
Ros: She desires to speak with you in her closet, ere you go to bed.
Ham: We shall obey, were she ten times our mother. Have you any further trade with us?
Hamlet: Come the music. Come the flute players. If the king does not like the comedy, then it seems he does not like it!. Come some music!
Guil: Good my lord, can I have a word with you.
Ham: Sir, a long story.
Guil: The king sir
Ham: Yes sir, what about him?
Guil: He is in his room, and is very upset.
Ham: Is he drunk?
Guil: No my lord, with anger
Ham: I thought you where smart enough to tell this to a doctor. For if I where to treat him, he would be angrier.
Guil: Good my lord, do not become angry and stay on topic.
Ham: I am calm, speak on.
Guil: The queen, your mom, who is very upset, has sent me to you.
Ham: You are welcome.
Guil: No my lord, your kindness is not of the good type. If you give me an answer, I will do as your mom said. Or you can excuse me and I will leave.
Ham: Sir, I cannot
Guil: What are you saying.
Ham: Give you a reasonable answer? My brain is fried. But the reasonable answer you want I will go to you or rather to my mother. So, my mother you say-
Ros: She says that your behavior amazes her.
Ham: What kind of son can astonish his mom? What else does she say?
Ros: She wants to talk before you go to bed.
Ham: I shall visit her, do u have any other business with me?
Ros: My lord, you once did love me
Ham: So I do still, by these pickers and stealers.
Ros: Good my lord, what is your cause of distemper? You do, surely, bar the door upon your own liberty, if
you deny your griefs to your friend.
Ham: Sir, I lack advancement.
Ros: How can that be, when you have the voice of the king himself for your succession in Denmark?
Ham: Ay, but sir, \'While the grass grows,\'--the proverb is something musty. O, the recorders! let me see one. To withdraw with you:--why do you go about to recover the wind of me, as if you would drive me into a toil?
Guil: O, my lord, if my duty be too bold, my love is too unmannerly.
Ham: I do not well understand that. Will you play upon this pipe?
Guil: My lord, I cannot.
Ham: I pray you.
Guil: Believe me, I cannot.
Ham: I do beseech you.
Guil: I know no touch of it, my lord.
Ham: \'Tis as easy as lying: govern these ventages with your lingers and thumb, give it breath with your
mouth, and it will discourse most eloquent music.
Look you, these are the stops.
Guil: But these cannot I
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